So the year is coming to a close...
Let's face it, it has been a year that has challenged most of us in ways we could never imagine.
A pandemic came to town and has stayed.
For me that meant losing the majority of my income in 48 hrs. As a self employed person, I have got used to no guarantees. You can lose a regular client at very short notice. When things are good I don't think oh let's spend it all. So I had money for a rainy day. I had ear marked it for something else but it was there and the something else will have to wait.
Restrictions
Few of us like being told that we can't be free to see people or go where we want and do as we like. On the other hand though we have maybe just been living in a very fortunate time, until now.
I had not realised how much I enjoyed being outside walking dogs. Well I had and I hadn't. Being told to do one hour exercise outside only actually panicked me. I found that my garden got pressure washed just so I could be out and be doing something.
Church
Well it's church but not as we know it.
I have been amazed at how people react. Some of my friends started talking about how their freedoms and rites were being denied. Interesting. The way I saw it however was we are not allowed to do it in the way (tradition) in which we are used to doing it. That is due to a public health matter (the pandemic) it was not safe to do what we normally do.
There were some extreme reactions.
You can use the Bible to argue your case for a lot of things. You can pick verses and shout discrimination but the truth is it wasn't. Arts, sports and faiths of all kinds were being asked to stop or rethink how they did things for the sake of public safety.
I like to take the stance that I am prepared to do things differently for the sake of the health of others and for myself. Even if it is inconvenient.
I must admit I am not in a rush to get back to in person services either. I love worship and I can be quite animated. It is hard to be in the sanctuary with a mask on, physically restricted....whereas the youtube live streams and recordings mean I can join in with my church or another and be in unity, even if the physical presence is missing.
Don't get me wrong, I have struggled like the best of us.
At the start of the year I started a COSCA counselling course. We had to finish it via zoom. One of the things we spoke about is the importance of endings. When you can't see an end to something it can be a real battle.
That is perhaps the hardest thing, not knowing when this will end.
That is why we have to have an understanding of self. What are the small things that help you in those moments of stress.
A walk, a good coffee, a zoom meeting with friends, a fire pit?
If you find yourself thinking "I wonder how x is" Or I should phone...
Do it. Don't put it off.
Be kind to yourselves. Not only that be kind to others. What gives you that calming moment, will not be what suits your friend. That being the case, your way might be the best way for you but it may not be the best way for your friend.
It does not mean that your friend is doing things wrong or that your are coping better than your friend. It just means that you different. You have different coping mechanisms.
My hubby likes the dog but he sees dog walking largely as a chore. He will sometimes take the dog out or even up the hills if he feels the need but largely its me that walks the dog. Mostly, I like dog walking (well it is what gives me income these days.) Dog walking has helped my grieving, it lets me think, it gives me exercise. Dogs don't talk back. I can walk and think or walk and pray. Two people with different thoughts on the same thing.
The year is nearly at an end and it is true to say I have walked less than normal. However, even in lockdown I have walked 1200 plus miles ( and then there was a week where my polar was broken.)
Being in lockdown is hard. Being in the smallest county is hard. It is however a beautiful area. You have to be able to find the positives in the amongst the negatives.
So stay well, stay safe and I hope to see you sometime in the New year if the restrictions allow me.
